★★★½
“Certainly no calamity.”
Calamity Jane is one of the larger-than-life figures who populated the Wild West in its later days, as it was gradually becoming civilized. The truth about who she was is hard to determine, with verifiable facts hard to come by. But like Robin Hood, this just makes her raw clay, to be moulded into whatever shape writers and film-makers want. In Jane’s case this means her over the decades being played by anyone from Jane Russell through Doris Day to, here, Anjelica Huston. This version of her story, originally a TV miniseries in two parts from 1995, is based on a book by Larry McMurtry. I’ve not read it, but by most accounts, it’s mostly an elegy to the death of the old West and its people.
This doesn’t feel quite as depressing, though certainly nods to the end of the frontier ways. Jane here is a down-to-earth figure, whom we first see working with the forces of General Custer. Fortunately, she avoids meeting the same fate, though tragedy hits in a different way, with the murder of Wild Bill Hickok (Sam Elliott, basically re-running his Tombstone character). Jane had long held a candle for him, but never managed quite to tell him. However, their relationship leaves her with a child, which she gives up for adoption to a rich family. Years later, she discovers her daughter is back in England, and joins the circus of Buffalo Bill (Coyote), to travel across the ocean in the hope of being reunited.
This thread is fine, with a tremendous cast doing good work, also including Jack Palance, an early role for Liev Schreiber, and Reba McEntire as sharp-shooter Annie Oakley [in my head canon, she’s playing the great-grandmother of her character in Tremors] I doubt how historically accurate it is: while Buffalo Bill’s show did play in London, I’ve not found anything to indicate Jane was with them (Oakley, however, was part of the show), and certainly not shooting up an English pub! But the old saw, “Print the legend” is likely applicable here, and I’m always willing to cut cinematic biography some factual slack, in the interests of making its story-telling more effective.
Less successful is the secondary plot, involving brothel madam Dora DuFran (Griffith), who again did exist, and her true love Ted Blue (Byrne), who did not. I was particularly annoyed how Dora repeatedly refused Ted’s proposals of marriage, preferring to retain her freedom… then got very upset after he married someone else, and even got hitched to someone herself (the short-term spouse being played by Schreiber). Either be with someone or not. They’re not a puppy on a leash for you to jerk around, and your history is not their problem. Every scene with the pair was a waste of time, and I was left wondering if I could create a ninety-minute supercut of the film, which removes them from the film as far as possible. I suspect it would be an improvement.
Dir: Rod Hardy
Star: Anjelica Huston, Melanie Griffith, Gabriel Byrne, Peter Coyote


Always a pleasure to cross another country off the map, and this is the first movie we have ever reviewed here from Nigeria. Indeed, entries from anywhere in Africa have been very limited, and in general, I found this a pleasant surprise. In some countries, film-makers appear to be trying simply to imitate Hollywood. That’s not the case here: this
Not long ago, I tagged
We all know professional wrestling is staged, with the outcomes predetermined, right? [Do not used the word “fake”: I will cut you!] Here, things are… murkier. This treads a delicate line between that and kayfabe, the wrestling term for promoting it as reality, and genuine competition. The stance here is interesting, suggesting that while those in charge, like promoter Toshikuni Matsunaga (Saitoh), can have a result in mind, that relies on those in the ring agreeing to it. This isn’t always the case [one wrestling show I remember attending definitely had a genuine fight, for backstage reasons], and here, Matsumoto is a loose cannon, prepared to go to any lengths to put herself over. Or her character: the lines are certainly blurred here, to the point of near invisibility.
There is potential in the idea here. It’s a shame it ends up feeling like two separate movies, both of which come out feeling under-cooked. The main focus is on Marina Delon (Loutsis), a teenage girl with the typical teenage girl problems, e.g. bickering parents, generally sullen demeanour, etc. Except, her dad Thomas (Paré) is actually an assassin, working for the very strange Poe (Oberst). This has contributed to the marital strife, because his work is why mom is in a wheel-chair – and is not happy about it, to put it mildly. However, things are up-ended after Thomas is killed on a job, and Marina decides to take over the family business.
The literary rating is mostly down to the sluggish way in which this gets going. Though having subsequently discovered this is the first in a
What the film has is a mute woman, Azrael (Weaving) and her boyfriend, Kenan (Stewart-Jarrett), getting captured by an equally silent cult in a forest. The time and era is uncertain, but they do have working cars, so it seems fairly contemporary. They want to sacrifice her to dark, humanoid creatures which inhabits the woods, but she is able to escape back into the wilderness. She attempts to return, so she can rescue her boyfriend, and encounters the group’s spiritual leader, the pregnant Miriam (Sonne). After failing to save Kenan, and narrowly escaping from the dark creatures more than once, as well as getting buried alive, Azrael vows to take bloody and fiery revenge on the cult, and also discovers the true nature of Miriam’s pregnancy.
While I have seen all the movies, I’ve never particularly been a fan of the Star Trek universe. I leave that largely to Chris, who has been watching the show since the original series. That includes Star Trek: Discovery, the series from which this spun off, and I was… in the room when it was on. But I
This low-budget Western does a lot of things right, but is not able to tie up all the loose ends in the final act. Most of which are ends that never needed to be loose in the first place. It takes place in 1890’s Oklahoma, when the gang of George ‘Bittercreek’ Newcomb (Henry) is trying to head back home. The gang includes a female outlaw, Rose Dunn (Butala), who is perhaps a little more moral than some members of the gang e.g. Tom, played by veteran villain Michael Ochotorena, this time covering up his impressive face tattoos. The situation comes to a head after Rose rescues a saloon girl, Ellie (Mattox), who just shot a man dead.
I guess it’s equality at work. This film, written by, starring and directed by women, proves that they are every bit as capable as men… Of knocking out vaguely competent, forgettable, low-to-mid tier action films, anyway. #GirlBoss This is another in the ongoing series of Tubi Originals I’ve reviewed here, including
If I’d realized earlier this was by the director of the underwhelming, non-GWG film,